I told myself I wasn't going to write this. I was going to be positive this year. Apparently I lied to myself. It's OK, Christmas is over and Santa is too tired to pay attention to his naughty and nice list..
There are the annual gripes like having to go out and find the tree, decorate it and even top it with a star with only the help of a 7 year old. Ugh. I hate the Christmas tree. There were new ones like trying to get Gman ready for his first Christmas Eve Service at a new church and not having nice shoes for him. Thank goodness it was a casual church and all the boys had on tennis shoes. Then there are just the general I don't like Christmas humbugs
Moving back in with the ex was supposed to be saving me money, yet I am finding myself broke. Totally broke. Like I have only four cents in my checking account and nothing in my savings account broke. If one of my attorneys hadn't so thoughtfully given us $15 Visa gift cards - I wouldn't have had enough money for gas to get to work. It didn't help that 3 weeks ago I was out sick with a head cold that lead to two days without pay and then a bout of the flu that took me out for two more days without pay. My contribution to my son's Christmas this year was ZERO.
My son is very pragmatic. He isn't one of those kids who asks for everything and his Christmas's never resemble a pop up toy shop. He only asked for four things this year. An Xbox360 with Kinect because we finally have nobody living undeneath us. This wasn't happening because his dad wants a Playstation 4 after the holiday shopping madness dies down. He wanted a kitten because we had to put our cat down last month. This also wasn't happening because his dad wants to be pet free. He asked for a flute. A boy flute. That was a maybe except I couldn't find one. Lastly he wanted a science kit. That should be easy right? That was to be his Santa gift. Except when the first chance you get to shop with someone else's money is Christmas Eve - you aren't going to find one - or anything else that I was able to drag out of him save for one movie. I ended up getting him a Nerf gun that he apparently already had. Nerf glow in the dark bullets that didn't even fit the gun I bought him, some PJ's that will only fit for this winter and the movie. I had to write him a letter from Santa saying that his science kit must have fallen out of the sleigh and he would get one from him after the reindeer have rested. I freaking had to give my child an IOU from Santa. WORST MOM EVER. Except he was so excited to have proof Santa was real and I was excited he didn't recognize my writing.
Thank goodness Grandma sent him a few presents so he actually had something to unwrap. Thank goodness for KC for being my Christmas Angel and finding a science kit for him and a wizard's kit at that. He is currently reading Harry Potter - so this was perfect.
Christmas breakfast was a failure because nobody wanted what we were having. Christmas lunch was a failure because I was told it was under-cooked. How do you undercook beanie weenies? My grand dinner plan was shot when I was informed there wouldn't be enough time to cook it when we got back from KC's.. Thank you Von's for being open so that I could throw something together at the very last minute. The ex got steak, the kid got chicken fingers and I got a mess to clean up - but we were all together.
So even though I was in tears after the breakfast incident, even though the presents were sparse, even though most of the day was spent with the men folk playing their electronics - it ended on a good note. The ex turned off the computer and helped Gman play wizard by making a test tube crystal ball. They took a walk to 7-11 to get an orange soda and left me behind so I could have a precious few minutes to myself.. We ended the night by making funny videos on the Crazy Helium booth app on my ipad. It ended with my son proclaiming that it was the best Christmas ever because he got his science kit, the movie he wanted and a lot of penguin stuff because penguins make everything better.
I still despise the holidays. I still pretend I don't for the sake of Gman. I just take comfort in knowing we have raised such an amazing child who can be so happy with so little. Besides - I'll make it up on his birthday. Video Game Truck anyone?