Friday, March 16, 2012

I Can't Change Time, But It's Sure Changed Me.

I'd like to think that I still have a modicum of hipness left in me.  If you were to actually see me right now - you would notice I am rocking a pair of skinny jeans, chucks, the requisite scarf of all So Cal fashionistas and fluorescent pink nail polish on my fingers and toes.  I have a strange obsession with Bruno Mars & could probably kick the pants off of any tween who challenged me at name that Radio Disney Pop Crap tunes.  I still get carded for video games,alcohol & at bars.  Despite all that though - I am getting old.

I first noticed it when I had heard Neal Diamond was touring a few years ago.  The first thought that popped into my head was "Wow - that would be a great show". My second inkling was when I discovered I had a full appreciation of the genius that is Freddy Mercury.  Growing up & being forced to listen to both artists made me think my ears would bleed. My parents played both artists rather frequently in my household.

The thought came full circle to me last night in the bathroom of the college campus I attend every Tuesday & Thursday night.  This girl had on the ugliest knee high boots I had ever seen, leggings & a short sweater/  My first thought was "DAMN kids dress dumb today". (I know I dressed dumb when I was young - just ask anyone who was blinded by my fondness of fluorescent in 9th grade.  Or the time I cut a peace sign into my shorts & wore then with black tights & red chucks.  Or the orange corduroy shorts or the pale pink patent leather high heeled mary janes that only I loved.)  Then I mentally recoiled in horror.  I am positive this is something my mother would have said, and her mother would have said and every mother who has ever been a mother might have said.

Then I started to realize how much my views have changed, softened and hardened. I remember whining, begging & pleading to be allowed to wear mini-skirts in high school & junior high.  My mom refused because she thought it was inappropriate.  I understand that now that I see little girls who look twice their age dressing more provocatively that I did at 25.  I get very annoyed when I see people walking to church on Sunday looking like they just left the club on Saturday or wearing jeans & a t-shirt.  Whatever happen to Sunday best people?  Yes you may say God doesn't care how you look - but shouldn't one take a little pride in their looks when they go to worship?  I am bugged more now than ever by people who don't use turn signals, who abuse the 15 items or less line and just over all stupidity.  I can no longer spend a wild night drinking and carry on the next morning status quo.  Hell I can barely stay up past 10 pm anymore.

It is a sobering realization when you think about it. What's next? I mean I have already used the "Because I spent 12 hours in labor to bring you into this world - the least you can do is hold the box of fruit roll ups for me" on the Gman.  I have called the cops when a neighbors party woke me up at 3 am.  I have considered Spanx.  I just hope I don't end up that creepy cat lady that sits on the porch and sneers at the kids going by yelling at them to get off my lawn!

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